When You're Teenagers, I'll Miss These Days

Yesterday was one of those days. You know the days where not only does everything seem to go wrong, but it all goes wrong at once? It was one of those days!

Currently, I am teaching summer school at an inner city Grand Rapids Catholic school. I'm teaching here because it is a practicum for a class I am taking. I need to be at this school at 7:30 a.m., which requires me to leave home no later than 7:00 a.m. On this particular morning, I left the house right on time, but I drove cautiously because the day before something had happened to my car. Those of you who know us know that this is not good. My wonderful husband has just one flaw, and it is an over-obsession with our cars. He cleans them weekly, if not more often, and to say he does not care for it when things go wrong with our vehicles would be an understatement. Anyway, on the previous day, while driving home from summer school, I had been rerouted into one lane of traffic because they were filling the cracks in the road with tar. The people who were doing the signage for the one lane driving were not paying attention and suddenly, I had someone in my lane heading directly for me. In an effort to avoid a crash, I inadvertently swerved into some freshly laid tar. This caused some tar build up on my front tires. I noticed it right away as they began to shake while I was driving. When I got home, I called Troy to ask what I should do, and being that he was busy at work, he said, " I don't know...just drive it and it'll probably wear off." For those of you reading this who may eventually drive through tar, DO NOT attempt to drive it off! It does not work and it makes things worse!

The drive to summer school the next morning included some vibrating of the wheels but was otherwise uneventful. At school, I spent time putting out fires such as a child who wet her pants and calling parents who only speak Spanish. On the way home, the car began having worse issues. It vibrated so badly that I could hardly hold the wheel, the vehicle stability control turned itself off, and the check engine light came on.

I arrived home exhausted only to discover that Greyson had been having some less than normal diapers and my laundry room was filled with dirty clothing for me to wash. I also called Troy to tell him about the car only to be told that it was my car, my fault, and how could I not possibly see that I was about to drive through hot tar? Why would I do something like that? I hung up the phone, attempted to make an appointment for the car to be looked at the next morning only to find that Troy had already called, and then I heard Grey wake up from his nap.

(At this time, I should mention that this post may be too graphic for some readers. Read at your own risk.) When Greyson woke up from his nap with yet another leaking diaper, I took him to his room to change him. While I was changing him, Kaden stuck his foot through the bars in the foot board of his bed, and got his foot stuck. He screamed bloody murder until I was available to free his foot. He then insisted on wearing his slippers which were quite the fashion statement with his jean shorts.

At this point, we headed downstairs to make dinner. I quickly discovered that there was very little to make for dinner, and set about making the boys a grilled cheese sandwich to share with the last piece of cheese. (I still hadn't decided what to make for Lauryn and I.) As I was looking through the fridge for the rest of our dinner, Kaden stated, "Oh, no...I peeing." With a quick glance I noted that sure enough, he had in fact peed, and it had completely soaked his train engine slippers. Readers should note at this point that Kaden has been wearing underwear, but has yet to actually use the toilet. He simply holds it until he is put back in a diaper for a nap or bedtime. I was hustling around cleaning him up and mopping the floor when I noticed a strange smell. It was the smell of charred last piece of cheese sandwich. In fact, it was the smell of charred to the bottom of the pan, fill the kitchen with black smoke, chip off and throw in the garbage sandwich. At this point, I began to cry uncontrollably. I called my mom to vent, and as I was talking to her and crying, Lauryn began rubbing my back and singing "Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star" to me. This only made me cry harder as I realized she was parenting me, and my mom was simultaneously saying, "I know you don't want to hear this, but someday you'll wish for these days." Right.

After I pulled myself together, we ate a gourmet dinner of bread and butter. Then, I marched Kaden upstairs, placed him on the toilet, and told him it was his job to poop in the toilet. I told him not to leave the bathroom until this had been done. Five minutes later, as I'm doing the dishes, he calls to me and announces that he is done. I trotted upstairs thinking that there was no way he was done. He has been known to sit for an hour without doing anything. However, SUCCESS! For the first time ever, he had actually pooped in the toilet! Yea!!!! We cheered, we ate M'n'Ms, we called the Gummys, and we took a picture. And I even thought there might be hope for my day yet.

As it were, that was not the case. Fifteen minutes later, while bathing both boys (if you want to know about that, see my earlier bathtime post), Troy called. As I was telling him about my night, Kaden began to yell. I glanced over my shoulder and noticed that someone had pooped in the tub. Kaden began to shout that it was Greyson, and then, pooping expert that he now was, began to lecture Grey on how it was naughty to poop in the tub and that you should only poop in the toilet. Greyson laughed and attempted to pick up the bits of poop floating by him. I began to laugh. After all, someday I'll wish to have these days back....